Hello fellow writers of The Tamriel Vault. It's Saryn here with another article. This one is all about description, the "do"s and the "don't"s, and general ways to improve your descriptive writing. So, without further ado, I give you:
Anyone can write a series of events. "This happened, and then this happened, and then this happened, etc. etc." This, quite frankly, is very boring writing, and should be avoided. You need to learn to give descriptions, focusing on the details that are important and ignoring the details that are not important or that people can assume. If you don't have enough descriptions, then your story isn't going to be very interesting.
There are also those passages that are chock full of description, but that are TOO descriptive. If you start to get wordy, people will get bored and lose interest in the story, and they may even forget what happened last in the action because all of the
So, here are Saryn's tips to follow to make your writing more descriptive, and more interesting.
#1: Avoid stating the obvious.
Sentences like "The yellow sun in the blue sky shined on the green grass." Are not good at all. Your readers are not in kindergarten; they know that the sun is yellow, the sky is blue, and grass is green. You don't need to tell them.
Instead, be sure to follow rule two:
#2: Point out things that are different from what you would expect.
Remember how I said that people know the sky is blue and you don't need to tell them. Well, what if it is raining? Is the sky blue then? No, it is grey and filled with clouds. This is something that is good to point out, because it is different from what is normal or expected.
An example: "The grey sky did not bode well for them."
In writing this sentence, we are pointing out the fact that something is different from how it usually is. The reader can infer that it is raining.
#3: Choose carefully what to describe.
Check out this passage by Denise Robbins: (link to source)
"Look at people, places and things around you in a new way. Notice not just the obvious details, but also the less obvious, subconscious details. In observing a man's clothing, notice not just the "suede bomber jacket, pink polo shirt, denim pants and brown leather shoes," but also whether his pants legs brush the ground. Why do they brush the ground? Is it because he shuffles when he walks? Notice the polo shirt has mustard stains on it, and his shoes have no laces. In real life, these details are exactly the kind of thing we subconsciously notice when we look at someone, and these are what you focus on when you write your description."
I can't say it better myself, so I decided to let Mrs. Robbins talk to you on this one. Be sure to take her words to heart.
#4: When creating a character, choose defining characteristics.
Brown hair, blue eyes - these are boring things to describe when talking about a character. Pick something about that character that is unusual or defining to talk about. Maybe the character has a unique mustache, or a nasty scar over his eye. Point out those things that are unique, not the things that would also describe the next guy on the street.
#5: Don't be afraid to use smell.
Check out this excerpt from chapter two of my story, The Last.
"Camlorn was busy, but nowhere near as crowded as Sentinel. There were plenty of merchants, sailors, and the like, to be sure, but I had a much easier time getting around. The slate gray stone buildings had a strange appeal about them—strangely inviting, almost protective, like the walls of a fortress. Another thing different about Camlorn was the smell—no rotting mead, stinking fish, or sweat. The whole place smelled of lavender. The purple flowers poked up all around the buildings and between the bricks of the road. The numerous banners, flags and decorations were the same shade of purple, and everywhere butterflies danced in the wind. Everyone I saw was proudly wearing a smile. It was a very appealing and beautiful place. It had lived up to its title, “The Jewel of the West.”"
The most important thing to note is the smell of lavender. Smell is the most powerful sense when it comes to memory. When you talk about how a place or person smells, it triggers a memory of that smell within the reader, making them more engaged in the story, as well as making your characters and locations easier to remember.
That's all I have for now, but as I get more helpful tips (and trust me, there are a lot more), I will certainly add them to this page and comment to let you know there was an update. If you have a suggestion for a new tip, don't hesitate to put it in the comments.
And as always, don't be afraid to ask questions! The Tales hosts are here to help you. 
Thanks,
-Saryn
Hello fellow writers of The Tamriel Vault. It's Saryn here with another article. This one is all about description, the "do"s and the "don't"s, and general ways to improve your descriptive writing. So, without further ado, I give you:
Anyone can write a series of events. "This happened, and then this happened, and then this happened, etc. etc." This, quite frankly, is very boring writing, and should be avoided. You need to learn to give descriptions, focusing on the details that are important and ignoring the details that are not important or that people can assume. If you don't have enough descriptions, then your story isn't going to be very interesting.
There are also those passages that are chock full of description, but that are TOO descriptive. If you start to get wordy, people will get bored and lose interest in the story, and they may even forget what happened last in the action because all of the
So, here are Saryn's tips to follow to make your writing more descriptive, and more interesting.
#1: Avoid stating the obvious.
Sentences like "The yellow sun in the blue sky shined on the green grass." Are not good at all. Your readers are not in kindergarten; they know that the sun is yellow, the sky is blue, and grass is green. You don't need to tell them.
Instead, be sure to follow rule two:
#2: Point out things that are different from what you would expect.
Remember how I said that people know the sky is blue and you don't need to tell them. Well, what if it is raining? Is the sky blue then? No, it is grey and filled with clouds. This is something that is good to point out, because it is different from what is normal or expected.
An example: "The grey sky did not bode well for them."
In writing this sentence, we are pointing out the fact that something is different from how it usually is. The reader can infer that it is raining.
#3: Choose carefully what to describe.
Check out this passage by Denise Robbins: (link to source)
"Look at people, places and things around you in a new way. Notice not just the obvious details, but also the less obvious, subconscious details. In observing a man's clothing, notice not just the "suede bomber jacket, pink polo shirt, denim pants and brown leather shoes," but also whether his pants legs brush the ground. Why do they brush the ground? Is it because he shuffles when he walks? Notice the polo shirt has mustard stains on it, and his shoes have no laces. In real life, these details are exactly the kind of thing we subconsciously notice when we look at someone, and these are what you focus on when you write your description."
I can't say it better myself, so I decided to let Mrs. Robbins talk to you on this one. Be sure to take her words to heart.
#4: When creating a character, choose defining characteristics.
Brown hair, blue eyes - these are boring things to describe when talking about a character. Pick something about that character that is unusual or defining to talk about. Maybe the character has a unique mustache, or a nasty scar over his eye. Point out those things that are unique, not the things that would also describe the next guy on the street.
#5: Don't be afraid to use smell.
Check out this excerpt from chapter two of my story, The Last.
"Camlorn was busy, but nowhere near as crowded as Sentinel. There were plenty of merchants, sailors, and the like, to be sure, but I had a much easier time getting around. The slate gray stone buildings had a strange appeal about them—strangely inviting, almost protective, like the walls of a fortress. Another thing different about Camlorn was the smell—no rotting mead, stinking fish, or sweat. The whole place smelled of lavender. The purple flowers poked up all around the buildings and between the bricks of the road. The numerous banners, flags and decorations were the same shade of purple, and everywhere butterflies danced in the wind. Everyone I saw was proudly wearing a smile. It was a very appealing and beautiful place. It had lived up to its title, “The Jewel of the West.”"
The most important thing to note is the smell of lavender. Smell is the most powerful sense when it comes to memory. When you talk about how a place or person smells, it triggers a memory of that smell within the reader, making them more engaged in the story, as well as making your characters and locations easier to remember.
That's all I have for now, but as I get more helpful tips (and trust me, there are a lot more), I will certainly add them to this page and comment to let you know there was an update. If you have a suggestion for a new tip, don't hesitate to put it in the comments.
And as always, don't be afraid to ask questions! The Tales hosts are here to help you.
Thanks,
-Saryn
