Markus's Musings: An Amateur Thief's Guide to Solitude

  • My good reader,

    It has come to my attention that amid the many helpful guides that one can find around Skyrim, precious few may be found to help up-and-coming thieves (that is to say, criminal artists like myself) to pursue a lucrative career in the field. And so, as usual, the duty of role model falls upon my shoulders -- not that I mind, of course. On the contrary! I rather enjoy the opportunity to share what I've learned. So! Where to begin our tour of larceny? Why, none other than perhaps the richest city in all of Skyrim!

    SOLITUDE

    Ah, Solitude, the Imperial city of the north. A fine example of good old-fashioned Nord ingenuity and craftsmanship at its absolute best. And above all else, Solitude is a prime starting point for any thief in training; there are so many treasures ripe for the plunder! So to get you started on the road to becoming a master thief, let's detail the easiest places to hit...

    THE WINKING SKEEVER

    Inns and taverns are the easiest places to steal from, though I hasten to note that not all of them are as rich and prosperous as The Winking Skeever; remember, we proper thieves are called to be fair to the poor and middle-class citizens of the province. However, one exception to the rule is The Winking Skeever itself, which has the good fortune (or misfortune?) to be rubbing shoulders with nobility. Thus, no matter what we take, they will never go hungry! Anyway, the Skeever's safe and strongbox are both located on the top floor... but for some strange reason, they are not hidden. In fact they're sitting in plain sight! What are these people thinking, leaving their reserves out in the open like this? They're practically handing their money to us on a silver bleedin' platter! Best remind them of why it's so important to hide your money from the public.

    THE SOLITUDE BLACKSMITH

    Not to be confused with Beirand's forge at Castle Dour; I'm talking about their reserve of iron, steel, and even silver ingots, to say nothing of the money they've made from selling weapons to the Legion. The door to this place is sitting opposite from Beirand's tanning rack; can't miss it. I suggest heading inside during the day; Beirand's assistant busies himself daily with sharpening blades and taking breaks from the grindstone to eat, drink, and rest. And since the building is open to the public during the day, his daily routine leaves the building's valuables vulnerable to any disreputable types who might take a shining to them. You can find the safe and strongbox in a bedroom upstairs.

    THANE BRYLING'S HOUSE

    What if I told you that one of the richest private houses in all of Skyrim could be broken into by an amateur thief in broad daylight? You'd call me insane, no doubt! Ah, but that's where you'd be wrong; see, because of Thane Bryling's importance in the Blue Palace, along with the importance of the others living along with her, the house is inadvertently left completely unprotected during the day! That's right! Furthermore, there is a secluded entrance located on the side of her house facing the Blue Palace. From there, all you have to do is pick the lock and you're in! You can find some display cases in the basement area, along with potions, fine clothes, and cheese on the upper levels. (thief tip: never doubt the lucrative value of cheese!) Oh, and it's also worth noting that these rich houses all seem to hold a few bowls of void salts for some reason... never pass up a rare opportunity for free void salts!

    THE BLUE PALACE

    Of all the high-security fortresses in Skyrim, of all the countless palaces and heavily fortified ruins, surely the seat of the Empire would be damn near impenetrable, right? WRONG! In broad taffing daylight, you can literally walk right into the Blue Palace and swipe everything of value without getting caught once! I kid you not! Every resident of the Blue Palace keeps their most valuable possessions in their bedrooms, which come with doors that can be closed while they're away -- which is all the bleedin' day long, while they're busy counting their septims and gossiping about the latest Cyrodiilic hair fashion! Ha! (I've even helped myself to that mage's staff sitting beside the Jarl's throne once... although it seems to have found its way back to its original owners. Be a friend and reclaim it for me sometime, would you? Tonilia can have it mailed to my present address.)

    I've no doubt that there are other trinkets and treasures accessible to new and budding young thieves, but this is a good place to start. Over time I'll write up other guides to help thieves in training to find the best stealing opportunities in all the major cities of Skyrim. Until then, shadow hide you!

    ~Yours in crime,
    Markus Sergius Blackwell

Comments

3 Comments
  • MarkusMasterThief
    MarkusMasterThief   ·  July 6, 2015
    Because I'd become used to posting all my stuff on my blog. But you're right; it probably does belong in the RP group. Maybe it'll get more attention that way.
  • MarkusMasterThief
    MarkusMasterThief   ·  February 24, 2015
    This is indeed written for low-level thieves.  If you've got a high enough sneak level you can get away with anything, so this was designed for players who are just starting out. The character will definitely be giving more advice in the future!
  • Krilkaazzoor
    Krilkaazzoor   ·  February 24, 2015
    Wow! This is a great slice of knowledge for newcomers. I'll admit, this should be directed at thieves whose levels are lower, as when your levels are high enough, anything is game.But this is a very good idea Mark! Lookin forward to the rest! :)