Alva's Poor Choices

• Posted by Naeg Runs-Into-Walls July 20, 2015 - 1,657 views

  The story takes place in Morthal in a world where a certain hero never got the chance to fulfill his destiny.

  Alva's house

  Alva: "Oh that Hrogar! He brought back the wrong mead again! I said Blackbriar mead! NOT Honeyside!

  Hrogar: "I'm sorry master!!! Please punish me!!! *Hrogar unbuckles his belt and lowers his trousers*

  Alva: "No no no it's fine Hrogar! Honeyside Mead is fine, just don't do it again! It's already noon so I'll go to the Tavern myself and bring some. 

  Alva exits her house and makes her way to the Moorside Inn.

  Moorside Inn

  Alva: "Hello Jonna"

  Jonna: "Oh! Hello Alva, how strange to find you here!"

  Alva: "I know! I've just been so busy lately! Anyways do you have any Blackbriar mead left?

  Jonna: "Oh! I do! A fresh shipment came yesterday!   *Jonna hands Alva 2 bottles of Blackbriar Mead*

  Alva: "So, have you heard any rumors lately?"

  Jonna: "Oh, have you heard? They say Fallion is an expert in vampirism! Scary isn't it! Why would an expert on vampirism come here of all places?"

  Upon hearing the word vampirism Alva panics and drops the bottles of meads and they shatter into 100 pieces of glass, the mead spilling all over the nice white fur carpet.

  Alva: "He what!" *Alva quickly runs to the door*

  Jonna: "HEY! Where are you going!? You can't just leave! What about my carpet!!" 

  Alva looks at her for a second but shakes her head and leaves, slamming the door behind her.

  Lurbuk: "Well that was weird.. say Jonna! That would make a good song don't you think!? 

  Jonna: "No Lurbuk! There are no costumers at the moment so don-"

  Lurbuk: "Oooh there one was a woman called Alva the big knockers gal and dropped 2 bottles and ran to the dooor!" 

  Jonna: "Oh no..."

  Lurbuk: "Oohh I smell a hit!!"

  Morthal 

  Alva is walking at a fast pace towards her house when she sees Falion coming out of his house, she starts running as fast as she can and runs against the child Joric and knocks him down

  Alva: "Oh forgive me child are you allright!?Yes ok good, sorry about that" *Joric grabs her hand and looks her straight in the eyes, ignoring her beautiful rack*

  Joric: "You're different aren't you? Not like anyone else. Not in Morthal, or Skyrim"

  Alva: "AHHHHH!! Let go of me!!!" *she runs to her house and again slams the door behind her*

  Alva's House 

  Hrogar: "Welcome home master! How was your visit to the inn?"

  Alva: "Shut up Hrogar! We have a problem! Falion could tell everyone about my vampirism at any time!! I've drawn too much attention to myself! Tomorrow night I have to tell Movarth about this! For now just don't leave the house!

  Alva paces back and forth from one side of the house all the way to the other thinking.

  Alva:  "Scratch that! Hrogar. go find Benor! I thralled him last night so he will be able to help us if anything goes wrong and bring him here, now!"

  Hrogar: "Yes master! I am still your favorite though right? I don't know how I feel about there being another man in your life..."

  Alva: "Yes yes whatever just do it!"

  Hrogar leaves the house.

  Morthal

  Durak arrives to Morthal with a frustrated look on his face and sees Hrogar running like a madman over the bridge.

  Durak: Oh! He's fast! Maybe he would make a good recruit for the Dawnguard!... Oh who am I kidding! I've been to 3 cities and not one person seems interested in joining us against the vampire menace! Not even in Whiterun where I found 4 dead vampire masters under the bridge at the entrance!

  Durak looks around, sees Highmoon Hall and starts walking toward it.

  Durak: "Jmm maybe the Jarl can afford sending us a few men, they probably don't have much to do here"

  Highmoon Hall 

  As Durak walks in he sees the Jarl, her two housecarls and a redguard the court wizard.

  Asulfur: "Falion... the townspeople keep giving me complaints about you being rude to them"

  Falion: "Rude!? They are the ones that walk up to me and start accusing me of things! Like the burnt house! Just because I can use magic doesn't mean I go around burning buildings! They are ignorant!"

  Gorm: "Calm down wizard! We already know that wasn't you! But we need someone to find out what happened! The guards aren't trained for those things."

  Jarl Idgrod: "Hush now children! Don't you see we have a visitor?"

  Gorm: "Oh no, not another orc bard... isn't Lurbuk enough? I already eat all my meals here because of that bastard!"

  Durak: "I am no bard! I'm a vampire hunter! And I'm here looking for potential recruits to join the Dawnguard!"

  Falion: "What? Vampires? As the leading expert in vampires in Skyrim I can tell you that there are absolutely no vampires in Morthal and certainly no layers full of them nearby so just leave us in peace!"

  Asulfur: "Wait Falion, lets hear him out at least. Maybe he can help us figure out what started the fire that killed Hrogar's wife and child."

  Durak: "Someone set fire to a house with a woman and child inside? The Hall of the Vigilants was also burnt to the ground, by vampires. Tell me more about what happened.
  

  As Asulfur is gets ready to speak Jarl Idgrod suddenly stands up from her chair and gets a strange look on her face.

  Jarl Idgrod: "WAIT I'M GETTING A VISION!!"

  Lurbuk: "She's getting a what?"

  Gorm: "Silence orc this is important!"

  Jarl Idgrod: "I see a man!! He's wearing black armor! A black hood with a mask and ebony armor! He's wielding two blue ghostly looking blades! He's terrifying looks like a Black Phantom ! He's chasing a dragon in the middle of the night!! 

  Durak: "A dragon!? Wait what is she talking about! 

  Jarl Idgrod: "WAIT! WHAT'S THIS! HE STOPPED! He stopped chasing the dragon!! He's picking mountain flowers!!!"

  Asulfur: "Ok ok that's enough don't push it my gifted wife"

  Gorm: "Flowers!? Why did he stop chasing the dragon to pick up flowers?? Of all things!

  Lurbuk: "Well some flowers have some very us-"

  Falion: "Maybe he's a necromancer!!! Or he's trying to summon a Dark Brotherhood assasin!" he says sarcastically

  Idgrod the younger: "Maybe the flowers are for his girlfriend! Oh that's so romantic! I wish someone got me flowers!"

  Joric: "I don't think anyone likes you sister, you're not very pretty"

  Durak has grown impatient, he has no time for this nonsense.

  Durak: "THE HOUSE!" TELL ME ABOUT THE BURNT DOWN HOUSE! Has anything suspicious happened around the town? And sudden changes in peoples behavior? People only coming outside at late hours of the day?"

  Asulfur: "Falion, Gorm you speak to our guests, I have to take our Jarl to bed.

  Jarl Idgrod: "What? Bed? Who are you!? Don't touch me! I have a husband!"

  Asulfur: "Yes yes, I'm sure your husband loves you very much" *he carries his senile wife into their room*

  Falion: "Back to business then, the only strange thing that happened was that Thonnir immediately moved in with Alva after his house burnt down, it struck the townspeople as strange since they nobody even saw them talking to each other before that and he refuses to explain himself"
  

  Durak: "Alva? who is that?"

  Gorm: "Ah Alva, she's a beautiful woman that lives next to Falion, we don't know much about her though, she tends to keep many things to herself and we rarely see her around town."

  Falion: "Well can you blame her? The townspeople here are ignorant brutes!"

  Durak: "Oh quit your bellyaching, would you say she only comes out at late hours of the day? Like at night?

  Falion: "Pretty much, yes. And we've tried knocking a few times but she never seems to hear us at the door."

  Durak: "So a mans house burns down and she immediately moves in with a woman he barely knows and refuses to tell anyone why? The same woman that only comes out of her house at night?

  Gorm: "Yes, but who a woman decides to spend her time is none of your business vampire hunter"

  Durak: "It is my business because this Alva is obviously a vampire!"

  Gorm: "How dare you make such accusations! Where's your proof!? Get out of here you filthy orc!"

  Falion: "Wait Gorm! How could I have not noticed! I've seen her going on long walks at night and visiting a cave nearby.. I always figured she just wanted some time alone. I didn't wanna jump to conclusions like the townspeople do with me"

  Durak: "So... will you gather the guardsmen or do I have to put down the foul beast by myself?"

  Gorm: "Of course! Lets kill that monster! She's definitely behind the deaths of Hrogar's family!"

  Falion: "Wait! Try not to damage the body too much! Especially the area around the chest!"

  Durak: "...you sick bastard"

  Alva's house

  Alva is down on her basement still panicking,

  Alva:  "Ok Hrogar you did well in finding Benor, although it took you a pretty long time, this is a small town. Nobody saw you right?"
  

  Hrogar: "Nope! Everyone was inside their houses!"

  Alva: "Ok I want you to wait upstarts with Benor, if anyone asks I left to go visit a relative in Solitude ok?"

  There's a large thud and a the sounds of sword clashing can be heard from upstairs.

  Benor: "YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE IN HERE!!" 

  Two guardsman came in and are being pushed back by Benor and his huge axe but as soon as he's ready to finish one of the guards Duraks shoots him in the heart with his crossbow.

  Gorm: "Find the vampire!"

  Durak: "Wait! We already know she's inside, burn the house down! Give the monster a taste of its own medicine!"

  Falion: "I agree, except for the monster part, she's a monster for praying on the innocent, not for being a vampire. And we don't want any of the guards getting infected with vampirism"

  The men leave the house and with Falion's help set fire to it.

  Alva's Basement  

  Alva: "I can't believe this, how did this happen!"

  The basement starts feeling hot, the door leading to it is already on fire and the stairs fire is slowly making it's way down the stairs.

  Hrogar: "I'm sorry master, but at least we can spend our last moments with the person we love the most. Shall we make love one last time"

  Alva: "No! Not again! Once was enough!! Aghh! I'm feeling weak..."

  Hrogar: "Come on, just one last time! *he begins to approach Alva*

  Alva: "I said no! Oh no.. I feel so weak... I must be losing my power over him..:

  Hrogar: "ALVA! Come to me!"

  Alva: "No! I will absolutely not! 

  The fire has already made it down the stairs, half the room is sea of flames and Alva jumps into it to escape Hrogar. The vampire Alva screamed in agony as the flames enveloped her body until she stopped moving. 

  Morthal   

  Falion: "Wait! The body! I needed it for my experiments!! 

  Durak: "Oh don't worry about that, if that cave you spoke of is real you'll have plenty of more vampires to play with and me as well. I just need to send a letter to my friend Isran.

  The moral of the story, you can be a vampire, you can have all the thralls you want but don't be homewrecker.  

  And so ends the story of Alva the Vampire and her amazing rack 

  A small coffin outside Morthal 

  Helgi: Hello? Is anyone there? Hello!! Hello!! Mom! Dad! Laelette? Anyone!!!

  Ok now it's really over, I don't know.. I was just playing and decided to write this. And I was already halfway through when I saw the "try to wait 24 hours before the next blog thing" sorry! And the Black Phantom in Idgrod's vision is this guy if anyone was curious.

  http://tamrielvault.com/group/character-building/forum/topics/character-build-the-black-phantom?commentId=6452022%3AComment%3A1495436&groupId=6452022%3AGroup%3A48137