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Tell us your favorite joke? (clean please) :)
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I just LOVE a good joke. My Uncle Rick knows like 10 million jokes and constantly tells them to anyone around. I've always liked to listen to his humor even though his jokes are mostly unrepeatable in public.
I read my favorite joke in a book a long time ago and after all these years it is still my favorite. Here goes! :)A man goes into a saloon for a heavy night of drinking. A few hours later he staggers back out of the bar, reeling and makes his way over to his horse. Astonished he looks at her and she is painted just as green as a leprechaun's ass. His blood boils and he storms back into the bar and screams "WHO PAINTED MY MARE GREEN??!!" The music is loud and the man is ignored and he screams even louder "WHO PAINTED MY MARE GREEN??!!!!" When everyone fails to answer once again, he jumps on the stage and grabs the mic from the band's singer. As the music grinds to a halt, he screams into the mic with all his might, "WHO PAINTED MY DAMN MARE GREEN??!!!!!!!" All of a sudden this huge 6'9", 370 lb. man jumps up and says, "I'm the man who painted your horse green." "Oh," says the drunk. "I just wanted to let ya know she's dry and ready for a second coat."
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Bo Burnham( though I wouldn't call him clean). Here's a clean example: There's a metal train that's a mile long and on the back end the lightning bolt struck her, how long till it reaches and kills the driver provided that he's a good conductor? He's a musical comedian, so that was actually in a song.
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I can't tell you my favorite joke if it must be clean but here is one " A blonde is at a vending machine and she keeps putting quarters in and snacks keep coming out there is now a line behind her and a man tells her to please hurry up so the blonde says I won't stop until I quit winning" Blond joke XD -
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LOL, love the blonde jokes. The bad thing is, I know several blondes that fit that to a tee. One girl I used to work with was on the phone at work giving out her bra size, then her preference on panties...I was like, "what the hell ya doing, Lenaye." She says, "oh, they are taking a survey..." And that's a true story.
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