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Top Ten Skyrim Fails

    • 33 posts
    March 1, 2015 3:55 PM EST


    As with any great game, Skyrim has its fair share of illogical or failures as I call them. Failures are things that make the player question the sanity of that Npc or wonder WHy the hell is this not an option. There are so many failures,however I will only be naming my top ten. I however want to see what your guys favorite failures are so comment below. Without further Ado I present Top Ten Skyrim Fails!

    10.Curiosity Killed the Cat

    Arniel, silly arniel. You wanted to see how the dwemer disappeared. Did you really think it was wise to try and recreate the unexplained disappearance of an entire race? ANd I thought wizard's were supposed to be smart. Then again you refused to teach us how to enchant so perhaps you aren't too bright after all. Cmon destroying yourself in a blinding light? FAIL!


    9. The Web That You Weave

    This one is a double fail on your part Arvel the Swift. Not only did you manage to get yourself caught by a huge ass spider, but then after we rescued you you tried to run away. Tsk Tsk, greed is always the downfall of you silly little bandits, you claim to care about wealth and yet you live in poverty outside the town? FAIL!

    8. The Fallen "Hero"

    Gaze upon her mightiness fellow SKyrim enthusiasts, the great dwemer researchist Katriah! ... Who fell off a cliff and died. I cannot even think of a lamer way to die, and to make matters worse your ghost stays behind just for a dumb artifact? FAIL!

    7. Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones But Words Can't Hurt Me


    Well Torygg, apparently they can, killed by a a nord with a big mouth. You died in a verbal argument, then your death proceeded to descend the land you once ruled into turmoil, which causes the deaths of hundreds all because you can't take an insult? FAIL!

    6. Eyes Are The GateWays To The Soul Or Nah?

    Malyn Varen, didn't your mother ever tell you not to go looking for daedric artifacts. Well you stomped all over her wisdom and in the process got your soul stuck in a little star shaped gem. Congrats dude, you must have an awesome life in that soul gem right? WRONG FAIL!

    5. An Eye For An Eye Or For An Elf?

    To be fair to Savos Aren, I suppose this isn't so much a fail as it is example of how lame some people in Skyrim are. The great and all powerful Arch-mage of the college of winterhold was killed by a moody elf with a giant orb. LAME!

    4. I Used To Be an Adventurer Like You...

    Karliah, your supposed to be an expert with a bow and yet you shot me instead of Mercer. And I don't want any of this I couldn't tell the difference Bullshit I'm a god damn Argonian, does Mercer look like a  lizard to you? FAIL!

    3. Honesty Would've Been The Best Policy

    Jesus Astrid where do I start, you freaking betrayed your best assassin and in the process destroyed our entire freaking guild. You then proceeded to burn all gross and burny and think giving me nothing but a stupid little dagger full of your tears makes up for it? FAIL!

    2.Let's Play Tag Your Dead

    Skjor, supposedly one of the "better" companions. While we were wolfing the F out you decided to take on the entire silver hand all by yourself and you wound up dead. Thanks for the wolf armor but next time have a bit of patience it will save your freaking life Eh? FAIL!


    1. Timber, Oh Wait Never mind

    I had to save this on e for last of course! Mr. executioner man I don't really thin the axe is so heavy you really have to sit there for 20 minutes with your arms suspended in the air taking your sweet old time when "Gasp" how convenient you fall over when the dragon comes. FAIL!

    Thanks for reading my fails I hope you enjoyed it please post your own favorite fails I would love to hear them

    • 1467 posts
    March 1, 2015 4:20 PM EST
    Lydia...that is all
    • 168 posts
    March 1, 2015 5:12 PM EST

    Unfortunately I play on XBOX so I can't post a screenshot of Braith saying "there is no one I can't fight" to me and 5 seconds later she screamed and ran away when an Ancient Dragon attacked Whiterun. EPIC FAIL little brat!!!

    Another one was a NPC battle between Stormcloaks and Thalmor. Even casting Healing Hands on the Stormcloak soldiers (because I hate Thalmor), they were taken down easily. FAIL!!!

    But the best of all was me against 5 Falmers. I smashed the power button to fry them all with Fire Breath Shout, but I forgot to select the Fire Breath and instead I summoned the Dremora Butler. EPIC FAIL!!!

    • 1217 posts
    March 1, 2015 5:18 PM EST
    Katriah was killed by an earthquake, so I don't fault her for that at all.
  • March 1, 2015 5:31 PM EST
    Torygg one doesn't make much sense.
    • 11 posts
    March 1, 2015 5:55 PM EST

    I seem to recall that Katriah hints at the earthquake being her doing, when she attempted the Tonal Lock puzzle at the end of the dungeon, which she promptly fails.

    • 1217 posts
    March 1, 2015 6:02 PM EST
    Yeah, it's an enormous trap, triggered by a puzzle that many NPCs and player characters failed. Indeed, the player's success is highly depend on the notes she leaves behind.
    • 1467 posts
    March 1, 2015 6:15 PM EST

    Or you can fight your way through a bunch of Dwarven Machines, that one is way more fun..

    • 1217 posts
    March 1, 2015 6:23 PM EST
    So much fun. I was actually a little disappointed last time I did it when I shot them in the right order the first time and didn't get to fight anything.
  • March 1, 2015 8:23 PM EST
    That last one should be for Alduin showing up to kill you and, in the process, saving your life.
    • 237 posts
    March 1, 2015 10:12 PM EST

    #10 Actually, Arniel isn't the enchanter.  That would be Sergius Turrianus.

    • 253 posts
    March 1, 2015 10:16 PM EST

    I saved that picture of Ancano, lol.

  • March 2, 2015 9:35 AM EST
    Yeah, I think Alduin was just pissed at the mortals.

    While we're on Helgen: the Stormcloaks soldier who gets executed. If he let that priestess finish, he *may* not have been executed, depending on how long her speech was going to be. Granted he probably would've been killed by Alduin.
    • 237 posts
    March 2, 2015 11:25 AM EST

    I have never been a fan of the Skyrim introduction.  Alduin showing up right as the hilariously slow headsman is about to swing an axe down on your neck, even though you're the only one who could have stopped him, is just too obviously contrived (and hilarious), and you get thrown straight into "You're the Dragonborn" within an hour.  I guess with how the main quest is, I shouldn't be surprised I'm disappointed in how it begins.

    The whole intro itself is kind of Fail #1 for me.  Alduin's just along for the ride.

  • March 2, 2015 11:50 AM EST

    I rather like the intro (as I rather like the whole main quest), but I don't like how you can't skip or speed it up at all. I can pretty much recite every line of dialogue from waking up in the cart to the meeting with Hadlof's families.

    But, I like the Dragonborn's story and have no interest in any of those alternate start mods, so...bleh.

    • 41 posts
    March 2, 2015 1:17 PM EST
    Man, I miss the old "sewer exit save" from Oblivion. You were able to make a completely new character, skipping the intro and tutorial dungeon, and go straight into the world.
    • 4 posts
    March 2, 2015 1:27 PM EST

    Karliah shoots you because she decided to save your life since she didn't have a clean shot at Mercer, not because she think's your Mercer. He was smart and let you go first, knowing Karliah was aiming to kill him.

    • 92 posts
    March 2, 2015 1:34 PM EST


    Malyn Varen didn't get stuck in the Star. He was dying from disease and wanted to use Azura's Star to seal his own soul and become immortal.

    • 1217 posts
    March 2, 2015 1:44 PM EST
    I believe that's how it supposed to be, but it's poorly set up. She shoots you...and then Mercer come out into the open anyway and *stabs* you. At that point, your survival is mostly luck, and she missed an easy opportunity to take down Mercer.
  • Tom
    • 624 posts
    March 2, 2015 1:45 PM EST

    Only two and four could be considered fails.

    2/10. FAIL!

  • March 2, 2015 1:52 PM EST
    Yeah, that one was poorly set-up. Why couldn't she just wait for a few seconds? It's not like he was gonna stay in cover forever. She had all the time in the world.
    • 1217 posts
    March 2, 2015 2:01 PM EST
    Haha, FAIL reversal!
    • 92 posts
    March 2, 2015 2:04 PM EST

    Seriously! Plus she waited long enough for this opportunity. She couldn't wait a few more seconds!

    • 16 posts
    March 2, 2015 9:19 PM EST

    I personally believe that it's the act of destroying the guardian of the Dragon Stone that turns the Character into the Dragonborn. You may see it differently, but this would be one of the many explanations for the dragonborn being able to be elven. Now this may not be the truth, but it helps for roleplaying purposes.

    • 93 posts
    March 2, 2015 10:35 PM EST

    Lucky's cabin. 'Nuff said.