Oh, Holy Triune and venerable saints of the Eternal Almsivi! Oh, Ghost of my mother! Only You know who I am and watch my every step. You have witnessed the burning furnace of my rage, and now all I have to show you is this shy powerless ember, almost opaque, but, oh, still hot, I swear you, still hot. You know my shame and despair, for I have failed my promises and neglected my duties. Dear mother, forgive me, for your bones are, after almost twenty years, still unburied and unwept, and have been scattered by the polluted waters of the White River, just like our people have been scattered over this cursed country, despised and forsaken. Yes, mother, just like you said, they drift apart and let themselves be dragged by the flow, aimlessly, forgetting their Gods, their Country, and their Destiny.
You know, my mother, how many times I dived in this frozen river, searching its muddy floor for your honorable bones, only to find this tiny knuckle I keep as my most precious jewel, hanging next to my heart. You know how many nights I’ve wandered Windhelm’s streets, contemplating the burned ruins of our house ( it’s still there, but they don’t let our people live in the old district anymore), and looking for the smallest breach in the security of King’s Palace, but the Coward is always surrounded by soldiers and bodyguards these days. You know the child that I was had the courage to enter his palace, demanding your body back to perform the proper funeral rites, only to be shouted and kicked like a stray dog. You know I followed the thugs that carried your body, along with dozens of other Dunmer bodies, to throw away on the cold muddy waters, as if you were only a carcass, and you know that I dived right after, and looked for your body until dusk, only to quit half frozen and half drowned.
So, only you can judge, mother. The question is: have I done enough? Have I kept my promises? Now, I have to be true, mother, because we are already arriving at the patio and I can see the shining edge of the axe who will put an ending to all my life of complacency and illusions. I tell you now I really don’t think I’ll ever find your body, and bring it in glory to the City of Dead, as you asked me, and I confess to you I don’t have the strength and the skill to kill the man who shamed you. So, is it enough to you that he will be executed today, honorless and surrounded by enemies, just like myself? Is it acceptable to you? I swear, oh sweet mother, I will abide by your judgment in this, if you still can believe my vows, but I do need a sign from you, because I am drifting too, and at risk of being dragged by the flow.
Now, the nord peasant one chickens out and pathetically tries to run away, as everybody knew he would, and I’m envious of the Devil, because even gagged and handcuffed, he walks proudly, like he’s a king among thieves. I hate him even more for that, if it’s possible. The blonde one is being taken to the scaffold and I can see his head pops off, as the blood sprays the floor, creating a rich red mud. I’m the next, mother, and I am all alone and still without answers. My falsehood and incompetence stings me as you turn you silent face away from me. I will die like a failure, apart from the God’s grace and from yours. I want to cry as I am put on my knees, but I will spare you this final shame. Farewell, mother!
A dragon! You send me a dragon! Oh, thank you, mother, thank you for still believe in me. Your mercy is great, but I’m well aware it’s not infinite. Those spankings and nights of cold and hunger have not been suffered in vain, believe me, you have not spawned and nurtured a weakling. I may have been slow and careless, but I am not unrepentant. You, who saved my life and also preserved the worthless life of the Villain, so that I can be true to my words, you may be certain that I will not fail again. I hereby will consecrate my life to learn and practice the skills I will need. I will plant the seeds of this revenge, I will water them, I will feed them, and they will finally bear plenty of fruits.
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