Goddahl Glass-Back

  •             The instruments of killing delight that Goddahl Glass-Back had so proudly used in his decades of vampire hunting laid now out of arm’s reach, broken in two. He cried out in rage, unwilling to accept that even though he was alive, he had lost. His echo carried far out of the depths of the cave, taunting him.

     

                This shouldn’t happen to me. No one is better.  

     

                 Goddahl rolled to his side and with a flurry of kicks, pushed aside the flattened head and splayed body of the vampire that once protected the cave. He picked himself up and tore off the broken chest piece of his steel armor, dropping it to the red stone at his feet. His skin tightened against the cold, and he found the holes in his gauntlets.

     

                Trash.

     

                The gauntlets clanged on the hard, broken armor.

     

                All trash.

     

                He looked to his great sword, once perfectly-cut Glass stone brimming with magicks of paralysis and soul trap, now jagged and pale in the dusty moonlight.

     

                I was to be a legend. How am I supposed to do that with armor that breaks? I said the best! Eorlund! You owed me the best! This is your fault!

     

                Goddahl stood listening to his echoes fade, and caught his breath. He patted himself down and found the wound on his lower back with insulting clarity. With cloth torn from the robes of the dead vampire, Goddahl wrapped his injury and drank his final potion.

     

                A large metal gate blocked Goddahl’s way out. He felt his way around the rugged walls of the cave until he found a small set of stairs, just past a strip of moonlight, that led to a narrow room. Hidden inside was a large pull chain and a single sword lying prone in an empty sarcophagus – a small iron sword ground to a pointed, double edge.

     

                To Goddahl, it was an insult.

     

                What is this? Peasant trash.

     

                He tossed it to the side, pulled the chain, and left the room.

     

                A creature growled to life from behind the raised gate. Goddahl halted steps away from the bottom of the stairs. He couldn’t see the creature; he could only hear its claws on the stone coming nearer. He slipped off his boots and sidled backwards, trying to feel out the best footing with his numbing feet. He kept his eyes towards the shrouded beast.

     

                Back up the stairs, quietly, don’t trip.

     

                Don’t slip, Goddahl. Don’t screw up.

     

                Goddahl’s throat closed as he moved back towards the iron sword lying at the top of the stairs. He crouched down and searched the cold stone for colder steel. He found its blade, then the hilt.

     

                He grasped it with both hands and raised it, waiting at the top of the stairs.

     

                The clicking stopped. Goddahl’s arms shook; he clamped his lips under his teeth.

     

                The beast stopped at Goddahl’s boots. It sniffed them, and growled as it traced Goddahl’s scent.

     

                The clicking grew closer. Goddahl tensed, his muscles burning.

     

                A jet-black head passed under the moonlight.

     

                Peeling skin with rows of jagged fangs.

     

                The creature lunged.

     

                Goddahl let loose his war cry and cleaved down the center of the beast’s head, killing it instantly.

     

                The cold blood of the beast coated Goddahl’s arms, billowing red steam from his skin.

     

                It worked.

     

                Goddahl ran his hand along the bloodied, rustic edge of the sword.

     

                It worked.

     

                All was quiet. Goddahl Glass-Back had won.

     

                It worked.

     

    Postface:

    This was an experimental piece for me, and spur of the moment on top of that. Any feedback is appreciated. Trust me, I can take it. Thanks for reading; hope you enjoyed.

     

    No Heroes (Short story TOC)

Comments

6 Comments   |   SpottedFawn and 1 other like this.
  • Paws
    Paws   ·  September 18
    It's atmospheric and tense, yet despite its brevity it feels loaded with character. In that short scene we can see how Goddahl thinks and his strategy, as well as feeling his confidence and vulnerability. Very cool! 
    • Legion
      Legion
      Paws
      Paws
      Paws
      It's atmospheric and tense, yet despite its brevity it feels loaded with character. In that short scene we can see how Goddahl thinks and his strategy, as well as feeling his confidence and vulnerability. Very cool! 
        ·  September 18
      Thanks Phil! My personal retreat seems to have paid off. Had to scrub some purple fungus off and come back swingin for the fences. Swinging with 600 words, but a hit nonetheless!
  • Zonnonn
    Zonnonn   ·  September 18
    This was awesome dude! I felt like I was in the head of the character, feeling his exposure and weakness. I'm also a fan of how you didn't explicetly tell the audience the situation, its all inference, which I think is very effective in the panicked and c...  more
    • Legion
      Legion
      Zonnonn
      Zonnonn
      Zonnonn
      This was awesome dude! I felt like I was in the head of the character, feeling his exposure and weakness. I'm also a fan of how you didn't explicetly tell the audience the situation, its all inference, which I think is very effective in the panicked and c...  more
        ·  September 18
      :D Thanks, Z. Sounds like I hit my mark. 
  • SpottedFawn
    SpottedFawn   ·  September 18
    You have a way with words, Legion. I like how short yet poetic this piece was. Great job showing us what kind of character Goddahl was in such a small amount of time. I envy your talent with brevity. Can I ask what creature it was that Goddahl killed? The...  more
    • Legion
      Legion
      SpottedFawn
      SpottedFawn
      SpottedFawn
      You have a way with words, Legion. I like how short yet poetic this piece was. Great job showing us what kind of character Goddahl was in such a small amount of time. I envy your talent with brevity. Can I ask what creature it was that Goddahl killed? The...  more
        ·  September 18
      Death hound! I could be wrong, but they've always looked to me like their skin is peeling off, what with the undeadness and all. And thank you :) I think my place is in short form. I'm not sure what that means for my long pieces, but you can definitely ex...  more